Part 1 Staying Connected
1、Communicate daily to maintain your connection. Use multiple means of communication to stay in touch daily. This can include email, instant messenger, messaging apps, text, and phone calls. Message your partner several times a day, and set aside time to have a real conversation.
- For instance, you might designate a 30-minute window every day to message back-and-forth or to talk on the phone.
- Make it a habit to say, “Good morning,” and “Good night.” If you live in different time zones, try to keep up with what time of day the other person is experiencing.
Warning: Don’t feel like you have to communicate constantly. You and your partner don’t need to be in contact 24 hours a day. If you feel pressured to always reach out, you’ll both start to feel frustrated and burnt out.
2、Get to know each other really well to build your relationship. Tell each other everything about yourselves, including your background, your interests, and your goals in life. Additionally, share the mundane happenings in your life so you feel well-acquainted with each other. The better you understand each other, the deeper your relationship will be.
- For example, start by comparing your interests, like your favorite movies, bands, and books. As you get to know each other better, you might take an online personality quiz and share the results with each other.
3、Be honest with your partner at all times. If you’re lying to each other, your relationship won’t be very strong. While you can’t control what your partner does, you can make sure you’re always telling the truth. Always be honest about who you are, what you’re doing, and what you want from this relationship.
- For example, let’s say you don’t make much money at your job. Don’t tell your partner that you’re financially successful.
- Similarly, let’s say you’re going to an event that you ex is attending. Before you go, tell your partner, “My ex will be at the party tonight, but you don’t have anything to worry about. It’s over between us.”
Tip: If you’ve already been dishonest with your partner, it’s best to come clean. Tell them how much you value your relationship and that you regret lying to them. Then, reveal the truth you’ve been hiding. Say, “I really want this to work, and I wish I’d never lied. The truth is that I’m not as thin as I look in my pictures.”
4、Learn each other’s daily schedules so you feel part of each other’s lives. When your relationship is based online, you might feel like you’re not totally connected in the real world. Being aware of each other’s schedules can help you feel like you’re part of each other’s lives. Share your schedules with each other and send each other updates about what you’re doing.
- Send them a basic outline of your daily schedule. You might write, “Wake up at 6:00 a.m., work from 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m., gym from 5:15 p.m. to 6:15 p.m., dinner from 6:30 p.m. to 7:30 p.m., hobbies from 7:30 to 9:30 p.m., and relax from 9:30 p.m. to 10:00 p.m.”
- Ask your partner to prepare a similar schedule for you.
Part 2 Creating Intimacy
1、Photo share at least once a week so you can see each other. While texting and messaging are a great way to stay in touch, share recent photo with each other allows you to see each other so you feel truly connected. Phone call is also works for you.
2、Show your feelings with small gifts, letters, and special messages. Being intimate is harder when you’re dating online, but it’s not impossible. Send your partner online cards or memes to let them know how you feel. Consider sending them letters or postcards so they have something tangible to hold. Additionally, mail them small items or send an online purchase to them as a special treat.
- Try to do at least 1 nice thing for them every week.
- Vary the ways you express your feelings. For instance, send an e-card 1 week, mail a necklace the next week, then send them a playlist.
3、Spice things up with some dirty talk. Being separated by a long distance doesn’t mean you can’t add a little romance into your relationship. If you feel comfortable, send your partner a sex text or write them an intimate letter. You might even consider sending them a revealing photo if you’re at least 18 and know you can trust them.
Tip: If you want to send a naughty photo, be really careful! At first, you might hide your face so that you can’t be identified. Take things slow so you know you can trust this person.
4、Read the same books and watch the same shows and talk about them. Having things to talk about will help you feel more intimate with each other. Choose books, shows, or movies that you’re both going to read or watch. Then, talk about what you both got from them and what you liked or didn’t like about them.
- For example, you might both agree to read the book The Hunger Games or you might decide to both watch The Office.
- When you’re reading or watching, remind yourself that your partner is going to be doing it as well. This can help you feel more connected to them.